A tribute to Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau

Yesterday I lost, we lost, one of the greatest inspirational figure in classical music. The great baritone Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau died at 86 (he was born in 1925). He wasn't a great operatic figure, since his forte lies in the art of German lieder, but it was exactly that facet which inspired me a lot. His recording with Gerard Moore of Schubert's songcycle Winterreise must have been the best recording of that masterpiece, and he had recorded it with other pianists (including Alfred Brendel) several times. Ah, those good old times when we could make countless recordings and could be appreciated by music lovers. Now it's all the downloading culture in the internet. --------- The baritone voice used to be considered as "the tenor voice who couldn't hit high notes", and then Fischer-Dieskau came to rescue its reputation. I am not going to post his biography, since one can easily find it now by googling him. I just wanna write about his impact on me, mostly when I was still studying in my early 20s. The first recording of his I heard was Gustav Mahler's Lieder eine Fahrende Gesellen, with Leonard Bernstein, taking the three movements usually sung by a mezzo-soprano and making them very much his own. But after several other recordings of his I listened to, two of them made a special impact on me. The first one was Britten's War Requiem, whose baritone part was written inspired by and especially for him. It became one of the landmark pieces of my life, not only musically but also an eye-opener to the real meaning of war, and therefore life. Oh and of course Britten wrote his Songs and Proverbs of William Blake for Fischer-Dieskau, a beautiful songcycle for baritone and piano which I still dream of performing one day. -------------- The other one was Sir Michael Tippett's The Vision of St. Augustine, a work for baritone solo, choir & orchestra. Sir Michael in that work attempts the "reach to exceed humanity's grasp" with the baritone solo, the metaphor for the present that follows Augustine's account of the vision combined with the chorus, the symbol of the past and future with its commentary on Augustine's narrative. Out of these disparate and conflictive forces, transcendence erupts. Tippett shows us that with effort, humanity has the potential to reach transcendence through music, and Fischer-Dieskau realized his aspirations. Sir Michael avoided any reference to the tradition of the Music of the Spheres in the Vision of St. Augustine so as not espouse transcendence as attainable through manipulation of patterns and numerology. Instead he turned to the music of the angels, those messengers of God whose language discloses the music of transcendence, and consequently, the connection to the Divinity. Tippett's principal vocal technique is glossolalia, those vocalizations or excited repetitions of vowels to depict the character of angelic singing. Glossolalia, a term from the Greek, are the wordless sounds and shouts accompanying ecstasy. Glossolalia is most prevalent in the vision of eternity, particularly in extension of the final syllables of "alleluia." Unison singing beginning with the lowest male voices extending through the ranges of the highest female voices creating vast arches, using short note values and antiphonal singing complete the angelic vocalizations, and require virtuoso singing from the chorus. It was this piece hanging in the back of my mind when I wrote my own (much lesser in scale and artistic quality, unfortunately) second cantata LIBERTAS which has the same (again, less quantity of instruments) formation. You can download the whole cantata if you have an iPad, iPod touch or even in your iPhone by just searching my name on appStore. By the way, in that app called "Ananda Sukarlan - Premium" you can also listen to many of my songs for baritone, sung by Joseph Kristanto. Some of those songs owe their existence to Fischer-Dieskau's inspirational voice, I must say. And now heaven is so lucky to have Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau. He is singing now for the angels. Requiescat in Pace, Maestro. You deserve to leave this world by saying that you left it better than when you found it. At least a humble Indonesian boy who dreamt to be a musician & composer could realize it, thanks to you. And you've made him love music more, and made it a big part of his life.

Broken but busy

So, I've been busier than I thought I would during this one-leg period. Things did slow down though, I must say. It takes me almost twice the time for taking showers, moving around (especially going up and down the stairs) etc. And I haven't had time to visit Google Art Project since I last blogged! But I did stay to fulfill the invitation for teaching in Rotterdam Conservatory last week, and I even didn't change the program of my lecture-concert there (though I didn't use the left pedal for my First Etude, which made it more difficult). I met some very enthusiastic students there and would like to greet them from Jakarta where I am now. /------/ I arrived in Jakarta last Friday very late at night, Chendra picked me up at the airport and we both went by his car to Bandung directly. I flew with Emirates and had to transit for 3,5 hours in Dubai. Since there were difficulties with plugging my laptop at the airport, I spent my waiting time scribbling down some sketches for a section of ballet music which I will work with Chendra later this year. Emirates didn't have WiFi on board either so that explained my almost-24-hour absence in cyberspace. /------/ We had some busy time in Bandung, talking with BIMA (Bandung International Music Academy) preparing our international piano competition to be held next July. It will be a very big and important landmark in classical music in Indonesia, and unfortunately the city of Bandung doesn't have an adequate concert hall, so we use the Bandung International School who's been very kind in collaborating by providing their hall whose audience capacity is around 220. That's the best we can get, especially since we can use their other rooms for the jury meeting as well as for participants (we will put several pianos there). It is located very near to the entrance to the city if you arrive from Jakarta, right after the toll gate, and next to the big university Maranatha. We invited a young Belarusian pianist Alesia Arnatovich last weekend to perform there to a fully booked hall, and that concert served as a litmus test for its acoustics. She satisfied the audience well, and received good critics from the local newspapers too. /------/ Just before I left home in Spain, I had a nice visit and interview frrom the leading Global & Greatness coach, Michael Thallium at my house. He made several videos of it, and a few days ago he finished editing the whole thing. If you want to watch the complete one, you can click http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_x5DcDyPUlY . Sorry for my stupidity after my 4 years blogging career I still cannot post a link properly here. Please just copy & paste it. You can read his introduction too at http://www.michaelthallium.com/en/2012/05/02/ananda-sukarlan-espana-e-indonesia/

My 3rd day in home detention

So this is how it feels, staying completely at home, mostly lying down for 3 days. I even haven't gone out to my garden (these 2 last days were raining anyway). Honestly I feel rather .. ehm .. gloomy for not being able to do many things I want due to my broken left foot, but looking back to these 3 days I do feel that I have done many things which, in normal circumstances, I would be too indifferent to do.

I revised my emails & facebook messages of the last few months, answered many of them (I admit I am not a good responder of emails, sorry for many of the unanswered ones in the past!), and thrown away lots of rubbish in my inbox as well as archives in my laptop. Anyway, thank you SO much for those many nice messages of best wishes from you all, friends. It means a lot to me that you are there for me not only in health but also in sickness. I also listened to lots of music yet unknown to me; I found great music of Erich Wolfgang Korngold, Gustav Holst (both have been my favorites anyway) and even discovering the music of Victor Ullmann who died young in the Nazi concentration camp. But the one thing I am most grateful for is the Google Art Project; thanks to this accident I have the luxury of hours & hours of visiting so many galleries in my bed without having any guilty feeling! Isn't it ironic now that I can't walk, I can explore more museums than ever? There are just so much great music created on this planet that I haven't got to know, even only through listening once, and so many paintings I haven't seen even only through their photos on Google Art Project.

Nevertheless, the most important thing is that I looked through many of my old musical works, most of them small pieces, and finished and revised some of them. And this morning I talked with Chendra my manager to publish the 3rd volume of my vocal works. Without this accident, this wouldn't happen soon, since many (at least 7) of those songs were abandoned & unfinished. I also find some short chamber works, such as a string trio, a trio for flute, viola & harp which I originally wanted to write for a friend who had a trio and performed Debussy's Trio and others with this formation. I was stuck that time and decided to abandon it.
This was also triggered by the intention of Patrisna Widuri, the initiator and founder of the National Voice Competition "Tembang Puitik Ananda Sukarlan" who wants to organize the competition's second edition next year. After compiling all my vocal works, I found 33 of them ready to be published. These include 4 songs on poems of Hasan Aspahani, 7 on Nanang Suryadi, 2 more of Sitor Situmorang and individual songs on those of Sapardi Djoko Damono, Sitok Srengenge, Abang Edwin, Sirikit Syah and the English ones by Browning, Whitman, Longfellow and even a Spanish one: retweeting @jlmejia , on short poems (and tweets) by Peruvian poet Jose Luis Mejia, etc. No duets will be in this book, and it will also highlight my preference to lower voices: baritone, bass and alto.

I have sent the file of those 33 songs to Chendra, and since he is a very fast-worker, I am sure that he will process its publishing soon, so I guess "Ananda Sukarlan's Vocal Works, Volume 3" will be released sometime in about 1 month time.

Break a leg! (on Friday the 13th)

Yup, that's what one usually say to a performing artist about to go on stage. In Spanish it's even worse, they say "mucha mierda!" which means "loads of shit!". If it were told to a politician who's about to give his campaign talk it would be more appropriate. I don't know the origins of those sayings (am pretty sure lots of google entries can explain it to you), but in any case those well-wishes phrases stem from the superstition that giving good wishes is considered bad luck. And yes, we artists ARE highly superstitious due to our insecurity towards the high level of unpredictability of our end products.

But I did get my bad luck a few days ago, and it wasn't on stage. It was an act as simple as going down the livingroom steps at my house, just those 2 steps that I've known for 13 years that I lived here. Maybe that's the bad luck key: I fell on Friday the 13th, after 13 years living here. And it wasn't as bad as breaking a leg, I just broke a bone in my left foot (if I had fallen at 13.00 p.m it might be worse). The most outer bone, that most vulnerable one. After I fell down, I didn't go immediately to the hospital but tried to live a "normal" life for a few days instead, until yesterday my wife insisted that we go visit the hospital since the pain didn't go away. And so we went, and they X-rayed my feet. And my fate for the next month is sealed: I will need 2 walking sticks to help me walk.

Needless to say, I will have lots of time this week, since I mainly lie down in bed with my laptop. Even today, I've read all those mailing lists which I normally don't read, checked all messages on facebook ... and tweeted of course. But I also have talked to my managers and we have decided that my next public appearances will not be cancelled. I have only a broken foot, which is so light compared to a broken heart or broken spirit! Even only 1 day has passed, I could already understand how life is for disabled people, and I'm sure it will inspire me for something. As you might know, I have written music for disabled people, and now by experiencing first hand how it is, I am more keen to do it. As I would be too lazy to bend one of my legs to live and feel how life is with 1 leg if I hadn't got this accident, so I feel lucky to have experienced this. So, next week I will still teach at Rotterdam as a guest professor and even keep my small concert & talk there on Tuesday evening for the students (mostly piano and composition), and the week after I will go to Jakarta where I will perform Tschaikovsky's Piano Concerto and that famous variation of Rachmaninov's Paganini Rhapsody with a new arrangement: accompanied by an ensemble of angklung! The concert will take place on May 5th at Teater Jakarta (TIM). This will be a very special experience for me. Other guest stars will be one of the winners of the National Vocal Competition "Tembang Puitik Ananda Sukarlan" Adi "Didut" Nugroho (yup, he's the tenor who asked for wealth to the shaman in my opera "Mendadak Kaya") and famous Indonesian pop singer Kikan Namara. Hopefully things will go well, since it's more difficult to travel with one leg. Wish me luck, friends, but this time I dunno how, since I have fulfilled your good wish by breaking a leg. Literally.

Half empty or half full, I just drink it!

A few days ago I got a message from India's leading inspirer / motivational speaker / personal brand expert Dr. Amit Nagpal expressing his interest in interviewing me for his highly popular blog "The Joys of Teaching" and it's been published here: http://www.dramitnagpal.co.in/2012/04/ananda-sukarlan-interview-with-piano.html . Now I am sure he expected a positive attitude from me and all other things that would encourage the readers to achieve success with hard work.

I am of course deeply honoured to be interviewed by him, but interviewing an artist or musician for positive motivational purposes is a bit against our nature of being since artists are more (hyper-)sensitive and therefore usually are pessimistic beings. Just remember Gustav Mahler who was obsessed with death (that includes the death of beauty, death of music as we know it, and of course his own physical death). Therefore when a dictator is rising in a country, the first people he gets rid of are scientists and artists: scientists because they know too much, and artists because we sense too much. But anyway, we did the interview and I did quite well (hopefully Dr. Nagpal agrees.. ?) as my first ever interview for this purpose. I expressed my honest opinions about life and music. I might not be the most optimistic person he interviewed, but I didn't predict the end of the world either :)

A big chunk of a work of art is a product of our subconscious mind. It has tremendous treasure in it, of course, but it is also there where phobias, paranoias, pain and other scary things (why do they always start with the letter p?) are hidden. Composing means letting ourselves delve deep into it, which means bringing all our darkest elements to the surface too. As any artist can tell you, when we are stuck with a huge block in our brain at some point while working on a piece, the best solution is try to forget it for a few days, and one day the block disappears by itself. I dunno why, I dunno how, and honestly I don't wanna know. The only problem is the approaching deadline of course, but that's why I try to work on pieces long before their deadlines are due (and I do finish many of them far before the deadline too, although there are some others which were finished, ehm, much after the deadlines were over) so we allow our subconscious minds to solve our mental blocks.

But it is due to our pessimism that we artists continue working. It is a catharsis to our negative feelings inside, even a cure, so that we become more human outside. By putting those dark thoughts on paper we reduce their existence in our subconscious mind. Yup, lots of darkness between those notes, guys! Gustav Mahler was so obsessed with his irregular heartbeat that he could only feel relieved after he wrote it down in his 9th symphony. Of course composing for him was also the cure to the great pain caused by the death of his daughter in 1907 (Mahler himself died in 1911). Mahler's music could sound like that thanks to all the pain he's suffered in his life. In other words, we now enjoy great works of art thanks to the sufferings of the artist. Thanks to Mozart's dad who abused him to overworking, we now have all those great masterpieces!

Talking about being a pessimist or optimist, what is clear to me is that I am not (anymore) a person who wants to change the world. I now realize only politicians can change the world -- to worse. It's due to their similarity to baby diapers: they're always full of sh*t and therefore they should be changed more frequently. If you want to make things better, the first thing is to make yourself better. That's why I never vote during elections, although they always say "vote me to make things better" ; no, no, we vote only to determine who are gonna take our money away. For unknown reasons. During campaign of course there are many promises in the air, but there's much air in the promises too.

I don't even know the secret of success. I am an artist, and an artist is very different than an entertainer. The difference is that an entertainer's job is trying to make everybody happy, while an artist should give his audience his honest expression and the highest possible quality of artistic product, which many times is not what is considered "nice". Just listen to Benjamin Britten's "War Requiem" based on that very explicitly politically incorrect poem by Wilfred Owen, and tell me that's it's nice and entertaining! To make listeners happy one should make a piece of music which is easy listening (which means singable and repeated melody and not too many changes of chords), simple text of words (usually about love) and of course a short duration, while an "artistic" piece of music can be anything from a short piece for a piercing piccolo solo to a (more than) hour long symphony for big orchestra and even choir.

When we are feeling low, listening to great music can help us heal the pain. Imagine life without music, and nowadays without your CD players, radio or iPod. So, don't underestimate composers & musicians, eh? One can't realize what one has until one loses it. In this matter, composers have a great advantage: we listen to music all the time in our head. Of course the disadvantage is that we can't turn it on and off whenever we want to. Now you understand why we musicians hate those shopping malls with music blaring from every shop, right?

On revising music ... and life

What are the most painful moments of a composer? I would answer: every time we hear a performance of our music for the first time. A few days ago I woke up receiving a link to youtube from a young clarinettist who performed an old piece of mine, Lust's Passion, for clarinet & piano. That piece I "discovered" among my files in Sibelius last year, and after a few revisions I sent it to Paco Gil Ortiz, the clarinettist who then gave a poignant performance with pianist Elias Romero. This is the video : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxOTd_sgRcM

As it is a piece from about 5 years ago there were some things in it which I wasn't satisfied with. But I decided I'd release it and let it have "its own life" anyway as I believe that every musical piece is a piece of the composer at a determined date or period of his life. But then, listening to the performance I realized that the last section is unproportionally too short. I really don't know why I made it that way, perhaps I had to write a "real" piece afterwards (what I mean "real" is a commissioned piece, you know, my real work, not a piece like this which I do "for fun").

I do have lots of short pieces like this, usually I do it when I am stuck in writing big pieces. Those pieces just appeared out of the blue in my head, and I write them down anyway, having the faith that they won't be in vain (and until now some of them even became the most performed pieces of mine, perhaps due to their practicalities, small instrumental formations and short durations).

But with Lust's Passion both Paco and me have decided that it really needs a revision in its last section. So I've been spending this weekend doing it, and I must say I don't really fancy doing it too often. It's like watching a video recording of myself 5 years ago and see how silly I was and trying to correct it. I never revise those small pieces until now. They were born spontaneously and they should remain as it is: spontaneous, as a record my state of mind, temporal madness and even stupidity at that particular moment. It's like suddenly I had access to that mysterious spot in my brain, and I let it go beserk for a few minutes or hours needed to let me write the music down, but then it should be tamed down and brought back to its hidden place. Big pieces, yes I do although they are more "corrections" than revisions, like my opera "The Mother whose son was kidnapped", but I limit it to the piano part since I play it myself. We are performing it again next May and each performance since the premiere in 2009 enjoyed (or suffered?) a revision, however small in the piano part. I can say it with my other opera "Laki-Laki Sejati" too, and I have revised some things in "Mendadak Kaya" which will be performed in Bandung next July as the opening of ASA-BIMA International Piano Competition. In fact, we have corrected and improved some things (mainly some impossible falsetti!) with the singers Adi "Didut" Nugroho and Pharel Silaban during its premiere last January, and those are the things which I wrote down in the score. Those 3 operas have their definite scores which can be performed by other people now.

The last few months I also wrote some occasional pieces for piano solo, such as "Unexpected Turns" for my childhood friend and now a prominent Indonesian writer Laksmi Pamuntjak for her (second) wedding gift, and "A Little Light Music" for the (belated) birthday of Edith Widayani, winner of Ananda Sukarlan Award 2010. Both will be included in Alicia's Third Piano Book which God knows when it will be published. In fact I've got several pieces for it although now Alicia officially declares that she's not going to pursue her studies in music. She still plays once in a while though. Oh, and the overture to the opera MENDADAK KAYA has now become my 6th Etude, I didn't extend it as I thought I would. I promised to write it for Japanese pianist Kazuha Nakahara who has performed several of my other etudes, and I was aware when I wrote that overture that it would be an independent (and very virtuosic) short piano piece. It lasts for a bit more than 1,5 minutes, and it bears the title "Ritual Dance" as an etude. The title reminds me of Sir Michael Tippett's Ritual Dances from his opera "The Midsummer Marriage"; in his case it's quite a big and impressive orchestral piece.

Just for my personal diary: I just finished my piece for flute & orchestra for the great flutist Andrea Griminelli. It's a noisy 8-minute piece called "The Wrath of Pan" (hehe .. yup, I stole the title from the Star Trek movie "The Wrath of Khan"). Andrea would like more movements, so the whole thing in the future would be a symphony about the Gods of flute. He's going to examine the music next week once he gets back from the US. When I said "just finished" it wasn't really true: I have 3 alternative endings for it, and haven't decided which one to pick! I hope the conversation with Andrea next week would help me make my mind. In any case, the piece will end "with a bang" as we always say.

Aaaand ... I already have the libretto for my next chamber opera ....

P.S : Wanna say hello to the cute baby of Nico & Meri, whose name "Emilio" was given by me. I wrote a short lullaby for him (also will be included in Alicia's 3rd piano book) during our coffee chat at the Surabaya Airport. I gave the manuscript to his happy parents which then was sent to me back scanned in an email, and when I copied it neatly in my appartment in Jakarta last December, ehm .. I made some revisions, so the final work is rather different than the manuscript which they possess now. What a fuss for a 1-minute piece, eh? Oh well, as Walt Whitman said, "Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself. I am large, I contain multitudes."

Original interview with Indonesia Tatler, Jan. 2012

Now that one of Indonesia's most prestigious lifestyle magazine Indonesia Tatler has published the February edition, I can post here the original (meaning the one that I sent them) interview which was then edited, cut and published in their January edition. Due to the limited space, the one published was just around half of the original interview, so enjoy this one.

1. New year concerts are common happening in Europe & America. Did the annual happenings intrigue you to create one in Indonesia? Why? Please elaborate.

Yes, I "stole" those ideas, but only the idea, not the content. We have to adapt it to Indonesia's situation, tradition and culture, therefore it's not done every 1st of January, but every first Sunday since our second edition in 2006. This year, since Jan. 1st falls on a Sunday, we do it on the 8th in Jakarta since people are still having holiday out of town during the first week. Also we want to make the program content as Indonesian as possible, as London does it as English possible and Vienna as Austrian possible. It would make no sense to make a new year concert with a Western content, as foreign people came to our concert to "feel" Indonesian as those who do to Vienna, Amsterdam etc. It has now become a landmark in Jakarta, and starting this year we do it in Surabaya (13th) and Bandung (15th) too, therefore the "J" in JNYC is changed from Jakarta to Java.

2. What are the pieces to be presented at the concert?

This is a groundbreaking program in Indonesia, never been done even in our 6 JNYC's before: two operas in one show: A Real Man and Suddenly Rich. We are taking a big risk here, since operas are still considered both "extremely high brow" and "boring" (too long? in a foreign language?) to Indonesian audience. The reasons we dare to do this are: 1. both operas are short (half an hour each) and in Indonesian, so the audience would understand. 2. Both are taken from two popular short stories by Indonesia's "father of short stories" Putu Wijaya, and the plots are quite simple, light but profound (both discussing single themes: the first about "what is a real man" and the second "if you have to choose, which one do you prefer: money or happiness?"). 3. Both are presented as comedies with twists in the end, so I hope this will bring joy and not a heavy burden for the audience. Imagine starting the new year watching a horror or thriller opera! Hopefully this will not only attract music lovers, but also literature fans as well as dance fans (Chendra Panatan, my favorite choreographer graduate from England is doing the stage direction and choregraphy).
The singers are considered the best young vocalists of today in Indonesia, since they have brilliantly won prizes at the "Ananda Sukarlan National Vocal Competition" 2011. They are still unknown, but they are THE Indonesian classical singers of the near future. Remember these names: Evelyn Merrelita (soprano coloratura), Eriyani Tenga Lunga (mezzosoprano) and two tenors Adi "Didut" Nugroho and Pharel Silaban. And let's not forget one thing: the Bank Indonesia Auditorium is not often open for public concerts, but in fact it is definitely the best hall, acoustically speaking as well as its luxurious design, for chamber music and chamber opera in Indonesia. It's amazingly good.

3. Any particular reason for the choice? Please elaborate.

Answered above, right?

4. Appreciation to classical music in Indonesia is growing. There are more concerts now as well as new venues - ie Aula Simfonia. How did you perceive it? How did you compare it with those in South Korea and Japan?

We are still way far behind those countries, since we lack one crucial thing: music education at school. It's true that we have audience that flock to classical concerts nowadays, but I bet you they are always the same people. I dare to say, perhaps around the maximum 3000 people in Jakarta who go to those concerts. Now, that's a very small percentage of the total inhabitants of Jakarta, right? And in my case, many expatriates are among the audience.

5. Does working with top musicians abroad means anything to you? Why? Tell us of your unforgettable moments with them.

Of course. I learned a lot not only from their immense knowledge but also their professionalism, musical craftmanship and artistry, not mentioning their contagious passion in what they are doing. It's amazing how, as a 20-year-old boy I learned about musical structures (the real one, not the one we learn from books) and how we play with psychological time and durations directly from masters such as Sir Michael Tippett, who saw the enormous potential inside me but also, in a nice and subtle way, told me that I was wasting my talent then and I should focus on less things. Greatness comes not from a huge talent, but severe self-criticism, hard work, passion, modesty and willingness to constantly go out of our comfort zone. And of course people like him really helped my career as he was the first "living legend" I met and the one who introduced me to the BBC for the first time, for example.

6. England has The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. Does Indonesia need one? Why? Please elaborate.

We have already many orchestras, mostly not up to standards. We need quality, not quantity to represent Indonesia. What is more urgent is establishing the identity of Indonesian classical music and only good quality musicians can inspire composers to do that. And then we need public and sponsors who believe in supporting our own musicians, and understand that classical music indeed originates from Europe, but every country has developed its own identity of it. Indonesia has not. That's why me and my friends started those competitions for piano and voice, giving platforms for young musicians to manifest their talents regardless of where they come from and to help them start their career and to be known to a wider public.

7. In the days of 'Orde Lama' there were designs to build an art centre plus a concert hall in the class of l'Opera de Paris in the area surrounding Museum Nasional, Jakarta. Is it time to start again with the project? How instrumental is the opening of such a grand venue in enhancing the development of performing arts? Please explain.

Of course, but we have to pay much attention to acoustics. Again, we have many theatres, but very few with the good condition for presenting classical music without sound system. As long as the architect doesn't consider the hall's acoustics as a musical instrument, it is doomed to be a failure. Look, in a piano recital there are two musical instruments: the piano AND the hall. That has never been thought like that by architects in Indonesia. And as you consult a pianist if you want to buy a piano, you should consult (classical) musicians when you build a concert hall.

What's wrong with being Indonesian (or Chinese)?

For me, nothing. On the contrary, I am f***ing proud to be Indonesian, especially after having lived in Europe for the last 24 years of my life (which is the most part of it) and realized that we are no better or worse. And I will show my discomfort if I am being rejected not for what I have done, but for what I am, among which is being Indonesian.

A few days ago (in January) Chendra my manager sent me an announcement of a national piano competition in Indonesia (for teenagers and below) and .. here are two things that made me uncomfortable:

1. One of the jury members is Ananda Sukarlan (eh? what a surprise! Another pianist in Indonesia with that name? Or maybe he's not a pianist but a politician or a businessman, as it's pretty trendy now to have them as juries in a piano, nota bene classical music, competition in Indonesia, and therefore I don't know him).

I want to copy and paste what I have written just a few weeks ago in this blog (about fakely using my office to promote a Korean boyband) again here:
I might be the most badly bruised musician in Indonesia. My music has been pirated and used without my permission (oops sorry, I should say they indeed asked for permission, but after Chendra caught them red-handed). Not only my music: an article from this very blog has been published in a major newspaper in Indonesia under a different name -- and yes, translated in Indonesian, therefore it couldn't be categorized as plagiarism. And now just my name, not my work, is used. And this case of using my name is not the first time that it happened, but since this very moment those who does anything of this will have the honour of being mentioned by me in my facebook and twitter account. I avoid names in this blog since this will stay a longer time, but the name of those honoured are very clearly mentioned in my facebook & twitter.

2. For the repertoire, after all those Chopins, Schuberts and Bachs, "Indonesian and Chinese composers are excluded".

I immediately went to the mirror after I read this. What's wrong with being Indonesian or Chinese? Of course I am not an especially handsome guy (I admit I do have a low self-esteem about my looks), but think of ... emmm ... Jet Li or, since we are talking about music (in any genre), what do you think of Jay Chou? And in Indonesia, isn't that pop-singer "Ariel" who now went to jail for reasons I don't understand, or actor Nicholas Saputra, or Anggun who is highly adored by the French considered universally beautiful? What is it then, our noses? Our heights?
Oh, oh, it's not about looks? Then what, about brains? Well I don't mean to boast myself, but my IQ has been tested several times and the results are always higher than 150. Indeed, I failed to enter MENSA (the international club for the elite geniuses) since I am just a few points away from requirement of 160 to belong to their exclusive club. But I do believe there are many highly smart Indonesians and Chinese that have contributed to the arts and science. Just think of the new generation of Indonesian writers: smart, sharp and brilliant. Many Indonesians are now having top positions in Silicon valley and universities around Europe, the US and Asia (I will exclude China, it belongs to the same dustbin as Indonesia, right?).

Wait, perhaps it's about musicianship! We are not as musical as the rest of the world! Well... let's see. Then why did Debussy, Britten, even until now Peter Scuthorpe, David del Puerto, and even younger composers are so amazed and highly influenced by the gamelan, kecak dance and so on? And in case you don't know, our traditional instruments such as angklung is declared World cultural heritage by UNESCO. Gamelan music is now as universally acclaimed as music by European classical composers, Brazilian samba or jazz.

Oh, perhaps it's this. We, Indonesian and Chinese composers are not QUALIFIED enough, right? So, was I making a fool of myself (and of Indonesia) when I perform at Berlin Philharmonie, Concertgebouw etc.? Those conservatories or music faculties are making a mistake hiring me as guest lecturers, eh? And Tan Dun definitely didn't deserve his Oscar (and was it a Grammy too?) for his music for the film Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. And of course, our brilliant young generation such as soprano Bernadeta Astari shouldn't have made her debut at the Concertgebouw a few months ago. Right?

And how about Indonesian of a Chinese-descent Indonesian composer or vice versa? A double negative is a positive, right? Do they deserve to exist?

D'you know that the great Spanish writer Miguel Cervantes said: "When there is music, there are no bad intentions"? Yeah, nice phrase, but it can't be more outdated.

Two things for sure after an afterthought on this. But remember, this is just a humble opinion from another Indonesian who is excluded.
1. It is not cool, smart or artistic at all putting all Indonesian and Chinese composers into one trash bag. Especially by fellow Indonesians!
2. From those two requirements of that Piano Competition, held in Indonesia for Indonesian young pianists, only one will be realized: Indonesian and Chinese composers are indeed excluded, as they wished. But Ananda Sukarlan won't be serving as a jury. I won't possibly contribute in the exclusions of my own fellow countrymen, and especially after they used my name to sell their product. Over my dead body.