Well I still give a f'ck, but not too much now

I never have revised my works in an extensive way. I always consider my works as both my children, but also "a document of how stupid I was at the time of its creative process", so I can look back and learn from it. Also, I'd be wasting time revising my old works and not writing new works, which I'd hope to be better since I've learned what NOT to do from the older works. There was also a false hope that my music gets better and better, which turned out to be not true, since there are some of my music of the past which is still popular among musicians and I myself consider those music .... well, not so bad. If that's really the case, then my latest Rapsodia Nusantara should be much better than my first ones, and that's completely untrue, at least from my own point of view. But this time I think I have to revise my work. Anyway, this is not a half-an-hour orchestral work, but a two-minute song for voice and piano, and not written many years ago but just a few weeks ago. It consists of 24 bars, and I revised from bar 14 until the end, which means almost half of it. It's based on a poem by Joko Pinurbo, a joke about mobile phone and God, so I used the Nokia ringtone, which in fact originated from Francisco Tarrega's guitar piece Gran Vals, written in 1902 (now that's a fact that many readers don't know yet, eh?). It's originally in A major, and I paraphrased it in many other scales and modes in just under 30 seconds. It was premiered just last week by myself accompanying the soprano Mariska Setiawan. Here's the news, use google translate if you don't understand Indonesian : 👇 https://jakartasatu.com/2024/07/04/ananda-sukarlan-mariska-setiawan-dan-melbourne-symphony-rayakan-75-tahun-indonesia-australia/ ................................................................................ During the premiere, the audience surprised me that they already got the "Nokia" rhythmic motif when it appeared the first time. I didn't introduce the melodic motif, just the rhythm with different notes. So, who said that "audience is stupid"? Oh yes, those "contemporary composers" guys who like to tailor the Emperor's New Clothes. So, this proves that the audience is EXTREMELY smart! I thought I would introduce the motif just by its rhythm, and then slowly go to the original melody, so the audience would have a "eureka" moment, but NO! They got it immediately. So definitely I have to revise it. ........................................ Now why am I doing it? I dunno, but yesterday for the first time I went to Access Bars of ESSE with my friend Poppy Louise, who is one among the only 20 practitioners in Indonesia. ........................................ Access Bars is a gentle treatment using light touch on the head that anyone can use. Energetic Synthesis of Structural Embodiment (ESSE) is an Access Consciousness specialty class that facilitates changing the structure of your body and life. Scientific research found that molecular structures respond to the observers' point of view, whether it is electrons, water, or even the body's fascial system. The tools of Access Consciousness invite us to be in the question in all aspects of your life and your body. In the ESSE classes, the practitioner invites us to be a question with our body. ESSE facilitates changes in the body's structure and form, contributing to ease with movement, function, and a different possibility with your body. ESSE deconstructs the glue of judgment throughout the body. ................................................................................ So what effect did it have on me? In fact, nothing right after the session. Only that I slept very well the night after the session, without being awakened by the sound of the praying call of the mosque near my apartment at 4 a.m., which awakes me 99% of the time. I almost never had the privilege of sleeping 6 or 7 hours straight here at my apartment in Jakarta. And the days following it until today, I indeed feel more relaxed and give less f*cks to everything around me. That's why I just revised my work without thinking more about it. I want it, I need it, well just do it. I guess Poppy took some of the demons in my body (and hope didn't insert them in HER body).