The truth about the number 12+1

Yeah I don't even dare to write that number, but I should openly, honestly tell you that that number terrifies me, and have had (negative) effects on me. There is even a name for the fear of number 12+1, and that is TRISKAIDEKAPHOBIA. I suffer from it. I wanna write this entry after the correspondence with my pianist friend Henoch Kristianto whose CD of his interpretation of my Rapsodia Nusantara is just released and is the talk of the week at the moment, telling him that I was (and still not finished) writing both Rapsodia Nusantara no. 12 and no. 12A (I haven't made up my mind whether it will be numbered as such or 12+1). He wrote : 12A! Oh, come on, you believe that kind of stuffs? Hehe, why not even go with a horror theme for no 13? And I answered in my next email : About 12A, yes yes, I am very afraid of that number, 12+1 . And if Shakespeare, Arnold Schoenberg and even JESUS CHRIST fell upon it, why shouldn't I? ............................................................................................................................................ Well I'm gonna tell you the facts, the real facts of what happened with William Shakespeare & Arnold Schoenberg. I don't have to explain about Jesus Christ since we all know that that number originally came from him and his disciples, which made a total of 12+1, and one of them (Judas) betrayed him. With Shakespeare, suicide occurs an unlucky 13 times in his plays. If I still should give you some examples, the most famous ones occur in Romeo and Juliet where both Romeo and Juliet commit suicide, and also in Julius Caesar where both Cassius and Brutus die by consensual stabbing, as well as Brutus’ wife Portia. And WS, I am sure, was very conscious about this unlucky number when he wrote Romeo and Juliet, which is a love story that ended in failure. Here we go: ............................................................................................................................................ Do you know how old (or better rephrase it: how young) was Juliet when she fell in love with Romeo, and then committed suicide just a few days later? As the story occurs, Juliet was approaching her fourteenth birthday. She was born on "Lammas Eve at night" (August 1), so Juliet's birthday is July 31. Her birthday is "a fortnight hence", putting the action of the play in mid-July. So, she was 13. And notice the inversion of that number with her birth date. Her name is JULIET CAPULET. Check how many letters does it have. And in order of appearance, Juliet was the thirteenth character to appear on stage (ok, ok, she comes out together on stage with her nurse, but still...). Romeo referred (or called her name) 14 times, and the last time he did was when he was dying. So you can count how many times it was before he killed himself. Now those facts I wrote just from memory, there are more things that involve this unlucky number. ............................................................................................................................................ And to top it all off, Shakespeare's Globe Theatre burnt down in 1613 after a cannon shot set fire to it during a performance of Henry VIII. OK, that year was perhaps just coincidental, but still .... ............................................................................................................................................ With the composer Arnold Schoenberg, it was more terrifying. He himself knew that that number would kill him. Indeed, he was born on September 13th 1874 and died on July 13th, 1951. His triskaidekaphobia possibly began in 1908 with the composition of the thirteenth song of the song cycle Das Buch der Hängenden Gärten Op. 15. Moses und Aron was originally spelled Moses und Aaron, but when he realised this contained 13 letters, he changed it. According to friend Katia Mann, he feared he would die during a year that was a multiple of 13. He dreaded his 65th birthday in 1939 so much that a friend asked the composer and astrologer Dane Rudhyar to prepare Schoenberg's horoscope. Rudhyar did this and told Schoenberg that the year was dangerous, but not fatal. But in 1950, on his seventy-sixth birthday, his friend, mentor, and fellow composer and musician, Oskar Adler wrote Schoenberg a note warning him that the year was a critical one: 7 + 6 = 13. This stunned and depressed the composer, for up to that point he had only been wary of multiples of 13 and never considered adding the digits of his age. He died on Friday, 13 July 1951, shortly before midnight. Yup, Friday the 13th, 76 years of age. Schoenberg stayed in bed — sick, anxious and depressed all day. In a letter to Schoenberg's sister Ottilie, dated 4 August 1951, his wife Gertrud reported, "About a quarter to twelve I looked at the clock and said to myself: another quarter of an hour and then the worst is over. Then the doctor called me. Arnold's throat rattled twice, his heart gave a powerful beat and that was the end". Gertrud Schoenberg reported the next day in a telegram to her sister-in-law Ottilie that Arnold died at 11:45 pm. I took all these data and some exact quotes from his biography by Hans Stuckenschmidt. ............................................................................................................................................ So now you have my reason of not writing my 13th Rapsodia Nusantara. In fact, I've been writing two Rapsies at the same time, and since I like to write a set of variations for my rapsies whose numbers are a multiple of 4, BOTH Rapsy 12 and 12A are a set of variations, and both are based on just 1 folktune, just like the 4th Rapsy is based on the song Buka Pintu, and the 8th on O Inani Keke. And I've been enjoying writing both rapsies very much, since all the pianistic ideas that can't be valid for 1 Rapsy can be applied to the other Rapsy. I planned to write both just 2 weekends ago, thinking that I would need a few days or a maximum of 1 week to finish them, but apparently I am still working on them. It's already 10 days now. But things are going well. And yeah, there have been some small misfortunes happening in this year that ends with the unlucky number, but overall, I am happy and productive. One of the happiest moments of this year is, of course the release of this CD by Henoch. Those Rapsies sound as I never imagined they could sound Check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBKjNO2fm50 . And I am excited to give a solo piano concert again for the Jakarta public after almost 3 years not doing so. Jakarta public? Well, I heard from Chendra my manager that piano lovers from all around Indonesia are already booking tickets for it. Put the date in your agenda: Sunday, October 20th at 4.30 p.m. at Aula Simfonia Jakarta. Yup, when it's over, you go out of the hall and you still can watch the nice sunset. That's why I am playing my light n sweet Sunset pieces too, apart from 6 numbers of Rapsodia Nusantara. Which ones? I still dunno. It's still more than 2 weeks from now.

Papers, papers, papers

I really dunno what to do with all this rubbish (read: my music). These days I've been unearthing loads of papers, scribbled with pencil, of all the music I wrote in the past. I remember once, in my polyphony class during my conservatory days, as usual we had to write a polyphonic piece as our homework for the week after. It was a 3-part fugue. My friends were complaining about writing one with a week deadline, while I handed out 10. Yup, TEN. And I told my professor to choose which one was the best, to be given a mark. He was surprised, baffled, irritated and amused at the same time, of course. And I kept on writing fugues, invenzioni and all those polyphonic rubbish whenever my brain is suffering from this crazy hyperactivity until this date, and most probably until I die. Now I usually finish a fugue in 3 voices (that's my favorite, though I wrote some up to in 5-voices, and once in 6-voices) in 1 hour, and even worse, I can take another piece of paper and write ANOTHER fugue, just after a break of having a cup of coffee or eating some chocolate. Or write a song, if I read a poem. Or any other piece of sh*t. Some (I must say, most) of them aren't that good, but I just don't wanna throw them away. And from those polyphonic homeworks, I have at least 100 pieces, from invenzioni, sinfonias, fugues, double fugues, canons, you name it. Anyway, this weekend I'm gonna sort them out and copy the ones I consider "ok" to "tolerable" neatly on the computer. What a nerd.

A short note to all winners, my colleagues

Just came back from Surabaya, after the exhilarating, exciting and inspiring National Vocal Competition Tembang Puitik Ananda Sukarlan (TPAS) for the whole weekend last week, organized as always by its initiator, Amadeus Performing Arts and its director Patrisna May Widuri. My impressions? Too much, too many to be written in words. Basically, I am more than happy to listen to all (yes, ALL) participants. Their vocal techniques are pretty accomplished. The only problems for some of them lie on their understanding of the music they sing, the interpretation and the grip for the style of the music. But each vocalist has something in them, and if I were obliged to write music for their voice, I know what kind of music suits for each and every one of them since they all have strong characters. As I always say, I can catch any elements in every artists in of all sorts and quality to inspire me. ............................................................................................................................................ But what's next, for those enthusiastic young vocalists, especially the "winners"? Well, I guess they should know that the last week's competition is the lightest, easiest thing they have done for their career, nothing compared to the real competition that awaits them now: the real life competition. It is right now that the real competition starts. Yes, of course all, or perhaps 99,9% of all musicians having a musical career today had gone through some kinda competition, whether it is purely as such, or auditions of some kind. While competitions are something normal in Europe, the Americas or already in many countries in Asia, it is still quite new in Indonesia, where we had, and still have the tradition of engaging artists based on family relations or friendships, not on objective qualities of the musician. For my new Violin Concerto to be premiered next month with the Nusantara Symphony Orchestra I had to hold an audition through youtube, and the winner was a young violinist of 17, Amadeus Giovani Biga who I didn't know at all before. I wouldn't be able to get his kind of quality among my relatives or friends. Many musicians are still weary, not to say afraid, to join one, and I even cannot think of a competition for instruments other than piano and voice here in Indonesia. Even some music teachers still prohibit their students to join one for being afraid of "losing". Well, if the only thing that matters is being the prizewinner, then I would discourage you to join one. Imagine, there will be only one, yes ONE winner among all the participants, no matter if there are 10 or 100 participants. What's the use, then? The answer is that being the first, absolute prize winner in a competition does not guarantee anything. Oh, then competitions are even more useless? Whazza diff between being the winner and the losers? Wait, wait. Read my thoughts further below and hope you'll understand my point. ............................................................................................................................................ TPAS hopefully would serve as the first step of their looong musical career journey upwards. Our previous (TPAS 2011) winners have gone to different directions, all upwards. Indah Pristanti (Senior Female winner) continues her voice studies in Vienna. Adi "Didut" Nugroho is enjoying his new career, not far from singing: becoming the conductor of the ITB University Choir, and still sings some times. Evelyn Merrelita stays in Surabaya, but is now the darling of our capital city; she's been invited several times to be a soloist by the Indonesia Opera Society, Nusantara Symphony Orchestra in Jakarta and all 3 of them have had the leading roles in my chamber operas. ............................................................................................................................................ But is it that nice 'n easy? Oh no, my dear. There is one thing that no competitions in the whole universe could do to filter the best musicians, and that is ATTITUDE. You can sing until all the windows break, you can move your fingers on the piano faster than the speed of light, you can win all the competitions on this planet and the others, but if your attitude is not exemplary, you won't make it as a musician. I will tell you the real truth: the more you become successful, the more "friends" you will have. Those "friends" will try to pull you down, since you are higher than them. They will stab you in your back, since that is where their position is: behind you. They laugh at you because you are different or outstanding, coz they want you to be the same as anybody else. They like to talk bad things about you, and if they can't find bad things, they will invent them, coz it comforts them, it soothes their worries. Remember : they don't hate you. They really really adore you, so much that they want to become you. It's called envy, and it comes from admiration, but a negative one. And you can defend yourselves from those things, my friends, with your attitude. The only way to eliminate your enemies is to make them your friends. Now, THAT you don't learn in ANY music schools on this planet. Remember, they consider you better than them from the musical point of view. But if you don't have a good attitude, you are definitely worse than them. As a human being. And in the end, that's what counts. Unfortunately, the most common mistake for upcoming young musicians is mingling with other people's business. You know why? Coz what people think or talk about you is NOT your business at all, it's THEIR business. So let them do their business, and you, my friends, yeah, you go on with your life. You, my friends, have a wonderful future ahead of you, having such big talents and coming from the richest country in the world which I am proud of. Show the world how great is Indonesian culture, and how you can give something that nobody else can give. You don't only share music in your life. "Behold, I do not give lectures or a little charity, When I give, I give myself. I exist as I am, that is enough" (Walt Whitman) ............................................................................................................................................ Winners of the TPAS 2013 are listed at https://www.facebook.com/groups/361289260607185/ . Congratulations not only to Isyana Sarasvati, Theodora Amabel Beatrice, Widhawan Aryo Praditha & Nikodemus Lukas Hariono who won 1st prizes in their respective categories, but to all participants. By daring to participate and challenge yourself, you are already a winner. At least for me, coz I'm like that too, and I'm proud to have you as my colleagues and friends.